Saturday, October 15, 2005

Last night my daughter Sophia had a fairly big session. I remember not to abandon her to her distress and stay in there close with her. It's easy to forget that everything is going well and that her so-called stubbornness is merely a place she is needing a hand.

It's not hopeless. It's not a reason to head for a doctor begging for drugs.

The other day a mom told me, "Sea, my son threatened to kill me!" I just smiled delightedly. She never asked me what I thought. She had gone to a doctor and gotten professional counseling for him. What was the counselor's advice? No priveledges at all for a month.

Hmm, this parenting way I'm offering is to stay close and listen. All sorts of anger and rage come out in a session. That's all it is, a "session." In my experience, every human being I've seen when given the chance in a safe, relaxed setting with lots of aware attention will bring up the FEELINGS of wanting to kill you. Period. It's not a big deal really--unless it's left there to simmer for years on end. Why not get it out in the loving arms of your parent?

Hmm, and again, every single time I've seen the human given the chance to off-load this kind of rage (and grief really that no one has listened up to this point and things have been just terribly wrong) ends up within minutes of that kind of release (struggle, yelling, sweating, pushing against their counselor / parent) is right back into a deeper joy, connection and love than had previously been possible. They certainly have no real intention of killing anyone!


Blogger Jessica Klarkson said...

Carnival of the Walkers #16
Shame Kills : Worried that you are too fat, too old, too slow to be out walking in public? Davetta inspires us to be visible, be audible, be tangible in the Fat Lady Walking blog.
Find out how you can buy and sell anything, like things related to private road construction on interest free credit and pay back whenever you want! Exchange FREE ads on any topic, like private road construction!

12:20 PM PDT  

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home

Progressive Women's Blog Ring
Join | List | Previous | Next | Random | Previous 5 | Next 5 | Skip Previous | Skip Next
Powered by RingSurf